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SHIT SHOW

2023

It’s all gone batshit. A whole ass shit show. The world has spun one more clock tick toward its decimation and ever more bound, entertained and contently infuriated with anything oppositional to its perspective.

Where to start? The vaccine shitshow? The sexual identity nightmare? The enforced nurturing of parasites? Good fucking grief, the goddam burden of existence! Almost enough to bulldoze this life into whatever’s next if I weren’t so excited to see where this mad mess is going.

2033

Everyone is castrated. Brains are removed and replaced. People spend their days watching commercials inside their eye implants, clicking red notifications and opening emails just to close them. Politics and reality TV shows are now one in the same. Families don’t exist. You have a lot of AI friends. Doctors only practice euthanasia. You have no property. Even your internal organs don’t belong to you. There is no money anymore. Just gold stars and demerits. You don’t remember what it was like last year, let alone ten years ago. You are very, very happy.

2021

I only got the vaccine because my kids wanted to get it. I really didn’t care which side of the debate was right. It was a good decision because my job required it to hire me. I’m not dead and neither are my kids. I still think that satanic pedophiles run the world and that it’s absurd to believe that billionaires have anyone’s best interest in mind besides their own.

2018

I’m drunk at a concert trying to go into the woman’s bathroom with my now ex-girlfriend and when security tries to stop me, I’m yelling, “I’m a transwoman! I have rights!” They don’t take me seriously and I don’t put up much of a fight. I just like using the woman’s restroom so we can do our drugs together, but I’m fine with using the men’s and getting high alone.

2022

There’s a street preacher talking into a megaphone beneath a statue of Abraham Lincoln on a Chicago street corner. He’s talking about God and the devil and I lean up against a post to listen because I’m bored and I need conflict in my life. He eventually gets to abortion after I decline an offer for him to pray for me. I interrupt him, saying, “But people should have the right to remove parasites from their own bodies.” He is very offended and goes on and on about how babies are not parasites and I’m just like, “No dude, they’re literally parasites. They can’t live without their host. Just because it’s human doesn’t mean women should be subject to their vampirism.”

2023

Depression isn’t a real thing if you can convince yourself it’s not. I don’t believe in depression anymore even though I was diagnosed with major depressive disorder and put on medication that made me think that God and Satan were fighting over my soul. Now I don’t take medication and am still sad most of the time, but if I believe that it’s something that can’t be combatted, it’ll just encourage the victim mentality I’ve been trying to remove from myself.

The great news is that it’s only going to get worse every day! That means that right now is as good as it gets and it’s time to enjoy this second because each one after will suck a little bit more. How exciting?!

Buckle down and get your vices at the ready. You’ll need them for what’s to come. Whether that’s as exciting as your phone being attached to your forehead or as mundane as chemically induced compliance through government enforced medicine, we’ll just have to keep the popcorn coming and make sure our catheters are secured as comfortably as possible.

Sin Seriously,
Jeremiah Israel

Inopinum

The Tunnel 008

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The Tunnel

The following is an excerpt from VERMiN:

He dug the mud from his eyes and face to see rats. There were two of them the size of cats and they rested on their hindquarters, paws together as if in prayer and tails twice as long as they should be waving behind them as if to signal for his attention. Above all, their eyes drew his focus with bright yellow light that glowed with streaking beams, illuminating the darkness around them.

He told his arms and legs to move him upright, but they stayed, as stunned as his mind. So paralyzed was Isaac, not even his nerves would stir.

“You are here to hear,” they spoke in unison, though their whiskered snouts and triangular buckteeth remained still. “Hear. Not fear. After all, we are not here and neither are you. Learn to not fear us now so that when we are, when you are, you will fear us not then either.”

Isaac tried to talk, but his face was without muscle.

“Hear, not speak. You will see and you will listen. Your tongue would only stifle you. Now stand.”
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His body obeyed before his mind agreed to and once he was standing, the rats hopped to his knees and climbed him up to his arms. He found his hands held out in front of him and the rats climbed over his chest then across his arms to rest on his palms. They were weightless and left no sensation in their ascent.

“You have questions because you believe your mind can make sense of this. It cannot. Yet. Not until you see as She sees. Question nothing, for though this is not happening, it is much more real than if it actually were. Walk.”

The rats turned their backs to him and their glowing eyes were beams that illuminated the dark as Isaac stepped through the sinking mud. Their tails wrapped around each wrist in a spiral that led all the way to his elbows.

Their light only reached so far and as his body moved at their will he noticed the ground losing its give and turning into hardened dirt and eventually grass. It was damp on his feet and then there was light besides the rat’s eyes. Stars were there as if they had always been. Trees were there as if they never hadn’t been. Leaves and twigs crunched under his bare feet and though they hurt, there was no way to change his remotely controlled self.

They reached a clearing where the light was no longer brightest from the rats’ neon yellow eyes and suddenly they stopped him and turned to face him once again.

“Above us is The Tunnel. You must not go into The Tunnel. You must not look into The Tunnel. When the moon is orange it is not the moon.”

Inopinum

The Ocean 007

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The Ocean

The following is an excerpt from VERMiN:

The terror always started with an ocean. Not that he was in the ocean or even above it, but that the ocean was all there was, weighing so much, being so much that nothing else existed. Then the horizon would rise and all around him were walls of water until he was completely encapsulated, claustrophobia rising within him until it shook him by the nerves. The orb of air pulsed as the ocean pushed in and once it took him, swallowing him on all sides, the choking began. The water forced its way into his mouth and blinded him with its darkness. His temples compressed under the pressure. It swarmed around him, groping his naked skin and twisting his muscles. The force of water kept his jaw stretched open as a continuous stream jammed past his uvula and into his throat. Salty liquid burst from his nostrils. Only once the pain reached its worse did he submit his will to it and only then would the dream end.

But he wouldn’t wake up, not completely. From there he would get out of his bed, crying, stumbling and mouthing nonsense. He was there the whole time and remembered it all, but his body was not under his control. His mouth and limbs moved, his eyes flowed, and he thrashed his way to his parents room where his mother would hug him tight to stop his flailing and his father would stand with his arms crossed, observing his son’s odd behavior analytically.

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Isaac took one purple pill each night before bed. It took care of the night terrors by stopping the dreams all together. Through his school years and even after, the pills kept sleep easy. Without them, he couldn’t sleep at all. He had tried to go without them, figuring sleep would eventually come, but just as his body settled he would be jerked out of relaxation, wide awake though deathly tired.

For the first time since the night terrors, Isaac had finally settled into unconsciousness with the aid of fatigue, lost blood and a concussion. There were no dreams and he woke up strapped to a table when fingers opened one of his eyelids. He tried to move his head, but it too was secured.

“Don’t move,” he heard and Isaac looked around frantically. “Stop it. Keep your eye still. You’re really going to want me to get this right.”